Angst!!

Warum soll man Angst haben?

Wovor soll man angst haben?

Vor einer Person hat man Angst.
Nur weil er Fremd ist?

Vor einer Schwierigkeit hat man Angst
Nur weil es so viel Mϋhe gibt?

Vor einer Dunkelheit hat man Angst
Nue weil man nicht klar sieht?

Vor einer prϋfung hat man Angst
Nue weil man keine Antwort weisst?

Aber eine fremde Person später
Ein guter Freund wird

Die Schwierigkeit wird auch gelöst

Die Dunkelheit bringt neuer Tag mit

Und die Prϋfung gibt den Erfolg.

Man muss darϋber denken,
Und nie in Zweifel hängen

Es gibt doch kein Leben ohne Angst
Aber wenn man nicht so denkt,
Hat man falsch vom Leben verlangt..

Communication....with kids..!

Talking to children sometimes is really tiresome or most of the times it is…. Yesterday I had the same conversation with my three year old daughter . When she came home from day care I was not able to find her tiffin in the bag. Usually it wont happen that way as the aunty in day care puts everything in the bag while leaving.

But yesterday it was not the case.

Me: Kim I am not getting your tiffin in the bag.

Kim: whyyyy??

Me: What “whyyyy”…why is your tiffin box not in the bag?

Kim: I don’t know.

Me: What do you mean by that? Did you have your lunch?

Kim : Yes I did.

Me: Then after eating did aunty put the box in the bag?

Kim: Yes.

Me: But then I cant find it.

Kim: Whyyy?

Me: I don’t know. Did you put the lunch box in someone else’s bag?

Kim: We all ate lunch together. (Well what was this?)

Now this was taking on my nerves.

Me: OK. You all had lunch together and then…?

Kim: Then we played. And Nandan had time out.

Me: Why did he have time out. Was he having your tiffin box?

Kim: I don’t know. Nandan, Neha and myself play together.

Aaahhhh..this was heading somewhere else. Don’t know where….

Me: Sweetie, last time I am asking where is your tiffin box?

Kim: I don’t like tiffin.

Me: I know that, but where is it?

Kim: Give me big strawberries in tiffin tomorrow.

Me: Sure I will, but first I have to find out where the box is right? So tell me where the box is?

Kim: Why are you asking me so many questions? We will get new tiffin box.

Me: (totally frustrated) Forget it I wont give you your favourite fruits in tiffin from tomorrow as we don’t have tiffin box.

Kim: I have pink tiffin box.

Me: WHERE??????

Kim: In the refrigerator.

Me: In the refrigerator? What is your lunch box doing in aunty’s refrigerator?

Kim: Mamma, not in aunty’s refrigerator, in our refrigerator.

Me: WHATTTTTTTT????

Kim: Yes, I kept the box in our refrigerator before leaving as the rice was too hot in it  ….

Then I ran out to see in the refrigerator and there it was sitting nicely on the lower rack…….

Me: Then whose lunch you had?

Kim: Nandan’s.

Me: And whose box was put in the bag by aunty?

Me: Neha’s.

I had no words……

Rain Rain!!

“Rain rain go away..Lil Jonny wants to play’….I know this is a nursery rhyme. But I always wondered about this poem. Is little Jonny not interested in playing in rain? Is he not interested in jumping in the puddles on the road? Is he not interested in playing with paper boats in the running water of rains? Well his choice. But as for me I always hated these lines since childhood. I like rain. I like trees in the rain, I like roads in the rain, and I like mountains in the rain. This is of course when I was in my teens. Where rains make you feel so romantic and forces you to pen down your heart.

But as a child as well I always wanted to go out when raining. I got wet all over and wanted to play. Making boats and sending them in running water outside the home was fun business then. Fully drenched coming home would be a fabulous experience as mom use to keep the “Bhajis” ready. Ohh what a day. Then slipping into dry clothes and having those bhajis with hot steaming tea was heaven.

Same is the feeling today. A rainy day is always a welcome in my world. If the day starts with rain then it’s a bonus. As a beautiful day breaking with sweet rhythmic droplets bouncing on the roof top is precious. Sometimes when it rains in the night I am awake watching through window. Ohh rain looks so different in the night. Have u ever seen that? Experience it. It’s lovely. In the morning the sun is out in the sky but hiding behind the dark clouds, as if taking a leave or so to say working from home . There but not there.

I like to drive in this weather, or at least go for a ride. The nature looks so different. So fresh, so close to me. All the lush green trees along with colorful ones are dripping water drops on the ground making it look like a show. The tree tops are waving to us with the wind making them move softly. Have you ever observed a typical activity during rains? At one time there will be a hard blow of wind and the raindrops will flash on your car screen or window panes with a loud noise. Aah that makes me feel so wonderful. I just have no words to describe how this makes my heart pull the strings. But I do enjoy that. Along with all the happy and merry flowers around I too take trills in my mind and cherish the moments.

A hot brewed coffee is one of the must-do thing in rain. The rich coffee aroma fills the air and drags me to have one more cup. Who cares how much caffeine my body is consuming as my heart is into action then. And exactly this is what I am about to do right now, this very moment. A big cup of steaming coffee with my eyes hooked on watching the "rainshow" outside….guyz you too are welcome to the show and not forgetting the coffee....

My baby-steps!!

Do remember the first steps u took when u just started walking? Every step u took was a centre of attraction and appreciation. U fell down one thousand times and took two successful steps…yaa I am talking when we started walking for the first time in life and that was adored by our parents and loved ones around, but hardly realized the adulation. We kept on practicing our walk every day and every minute of our life then, and finally see till where we have come. A complete 30 years of life. That’s an achievement.

U must be wondering why am I remembering those things right now. But I re-lived my childhood a few months back. I started to learn skating, and believe me it was a disaster for the first time. I never thought it would be so very difficult. I am an experienced walker and just wearing wheels would not hinder my experienced activity. This was the thought I had in mind. On first day I took my skate shoes, and sitting on the given bench wore them. I was ready to slide-on like seen on TV. Ohh what a feeling. Thinking about it I stood up, or did I really stand? I slipped off and fell off on the floor. Just could not get what happened. Thinking it was an accident I tried getting up and wanted to go to the counter to talk to the person about shoes. I managed taking small steps taking the support of the wall there.

Finally reached the counter and was talking to the person concerned and god knows what happened again and I was lying on the floor straight on my back with my feet up high in the air. The person at the counter must have thought that I was talking to this lady a second ago and where has she vanished. But I guess he must have had so many such experiences like mine. And there I was lying still waiting to get some help to stand up. My husband came running and tried pulling me up. Oh my gosh, just could not get it. He then literally held me by my arms and made me stand.

I had mixed emotions then, wanted to cry aloud as my back was completely out as I hit it directly on the floor and also wanted to laugh insane as it was a total fiasco in front of all the skaters who were very young in age and were not getting why this lady keeps on falling every now and then. People around must have had a great show. It was practically an outburst for my husband that day. I literally fell down at least 20 times in those 10 minutes. And I was nervous now, as it was becoming more and more difficult for me to even stand. But then I kept on practicing. I now go every weekend for skating and can stand on my own and try to move ahead as well.

But this was one great experience in life where I learnt that whatever it takes to know about new skills we have to go on. The best motivation for me was my husband who kept on encouraging me every time I fell and my daughter who had no fear at all wearing wheels. She was so comfortable with it and swept through the floor smoothly. She was not even aware that she might fall as children do not know fear of anything,. And that’s what probably they do things successfully. I had fear in mind the very moment I wore those skates that I might fall. But I learnt again be fearless, I know it’s a bit tough at our age, but try to be fearless and things are easy.

And that’s how I re-lived my childhood steps, my first baby-steps with the only difference of being conscious of what would people say around me if I fall……….but succeeded.

Break Free!

Like the rain
after summer

I want to break free

Like a small plant
That grows into big tree

I want to break free

Like a child
Crying out loud

I want to break free

Life is suppressed
I need to fight
Holding back emotions
I will fight

Yes, I will fight
As I want to break free…..